Thursday, 4 May 2017

The Rapist & the Rape Apologists.

About 6 years ago in one of Nigeria's campuses, a young girl was raped by four boys in a room and there was outrage online but I was surprised at some of the comments made by young Nigerians (both girls and boys) concerning the Rape. Comments that would sum up to;
●Yes Rape is bad but what is a girl doing in a room with 4 guys?
●Why didn't she scream?
●Am sure she wasn't decently dressed. She tempted them!
Now I want you to see the inhumanity in these statements and the gravity of its contents.
People tend to occupy the World in the way they socialise to it. In Africa young people are taught to always blame girls (rape victims) for the Rape. While I was in secondary school, my teachers taught us to always cover our nakedness 'properly' so that we won't seduce men and avoid the risk of being rape victims. I really found this alarming as it contradicts some of the knowledge I have about Africa; Black women were known to be expose their bodies and were never ashamed and most importantly there was never any case of Rape. We teach girls shame! Cover your legs and we  make mistakes of always linking morality to dressing. In the process we raise girls who see themselves as sexual-prey who must tend to the fragile ego of men and create space for men to be monsters and sexual-predators. But the truth be told;
● Men are not Monsters.
●Women are not sexual-prey.
Rape is not a spontaneous action, it is a premeditated act of wickedness and as such rapist should be punished. Men should know that 'No' is a No and no matter what circumstances,whether the victim is drunk,drugged, or sober her opinion must be respected. Being a Rape victim comes with stigma and trauma and a struggle to overcome both and move on with life. It's an injury to one's dignity and the after effects can be devastating.
Most Rape Apologists often think that being a rape victim will make one morally strong and perhaps dress 'properly' to prevent future occurrences but victimhood is not a virtue. They always give excuse for men to be sexual-predators but thank God for civilisation:for the sole purpose of civilisation is learning, unlearning and relearning. We have to unlearn some of the false ideas we have about rape and to learn that rape is not an involuntary action (like blinking of eyes,in that sense we can relearn good ideas and tackle rape cases seriously. If a married man rapes his wife, he his guilty of Rape and we shouldn't in anyway try to be apologetic about the issue and waving it off with comments like;
● Afterall he paid for it.
●She's supposed to be submissive...and all manner of silly statements.
Rape is Rape and we Africans must treat it like it is.
Daalu.